Low Self Esteem
The Mental Oppressor
Only in recent years have we started to realise how low self esteem (LSE) can affect our behaviour and thus our lives. Yet it has been so underrated and ignored for so long that it is still not fully understood and recognized.
Let's start by looking at what low self esteem is not. It is not like being humble, it is not a virtue. Rejecting compliments and diminishing yourself and your successes with comments like
"it was nothing" or "I got lucky" is not a virtue in the same way that giving yourself a pat in the back or feeling good about yourself after achieving something is not a sin.
Poor self image is like looking at yourself in a carnival mirror where your weaknesses and faults are exaggerated but your strengths and qualities are invisible.
It is a distorted view of yourself that has little to do with the reality but since you always act in accordance with your self beliefs, it becomes YOUR reality.
For example, there is a job or promotion that you would love to get, but you don't think you are good enough nor have the skill so you don't apply for it and obviously don't get it. The reality is not that you didn't get the job because you were not good enough nor had the skills but because you didn't apply for it and this, is your reality.
People with low self esteem reject themselves or parts of themselves.
They avoid challenges, trying new ventures or exposing themselves. They have no faith in themselve so they take no risk to make sure they won't FAIL.
This is a big word, "FAIL". I have been so scared of that word for so many years... "What if I fail.. I better just stay here and do nothing, at least I won't FAIL".
The problem with this is, when we stay in our comfort zone and avoid challenges and changes, We don't move, we don't achieve anything, we don't grow thus we don't live, we're stuck.
Stuck like a duck in the mud.
And eventually, we end up feeling like a failure anyway, this sense of non-achievement when you wake up one day and think "what if I had gone for that job, invite that girl/boy for dinner, went to that trip, where would I be now?".
And the thing we were trying to avoid all this time (failing) is now knocking at the back of our mind.
It is also difficult for people who lack self esteem to express themselves socially or in private and as a result they may have a small or non-existent circle of friends which may lead to loneliness or have trouble to embrace the full potential of healthy relationships where openness and expression is a must.
These are only a few examples of the effects of low self esteem but there are many more that can damage your life in many ways like stress or depression which are often a by-product of low self esteem but ignored as such.
Overcoming low self esteem
Overcoming low self esteem requires persistence, vigilance and commitment but the rewards you will reap from your efforts will be life changing. It will lead you to freedom.
The freedom to ask for what you want in life, to express and open yourself to others, to be creative, to grow and accept challenges without fear, to become who you really want to be and to embrace the world with open arms. The freedom to become the most that you can be.
Help for low self esteem
The first thing to do is to get acquainted with the subject. In other words, Get to know your opponent, study it.
we tend to fear what we don't know so do your homework and get to know the signs , causes and effects of low self esteem,
how it can lead to stress and depression or even loneliness.
You can also register here for a free Self Confidence Course that I highly recommend, plus you get three more free courses as a bonus.
Whether you need improvement in only one area of your life (for example your relationships or shyness)
or need a full emotional make-over, learn all you can about it and you will then be ready to fight it.
So here you are... below are some more articles to help you to unmask the beast.
Causes of LSE
Effects of LSE
Jealousy in relationships
Dealing with loneliness
Healthy body image
Improving self esteem
Return from low self esteem to my self esteem, my life homepage
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